The Villain Not Quite Bad Enough to Hate

from by April Fish

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lyrics

I am chasing you with piranha teeth.
I will catch you to kiss you until you bleed.
I am loving you intentionally; mind over heart, protect me from feeling.
Walk in front of me; I’m FEAR... fearful that you might grow some wings.

I’m not that vulnerable – no, wait – I COULD be, but I won’t be THAT.
I’ll harden up my heart so you won’t start to get to me.

I’ll take everything you have to give, spin around, and call it my own.
Face me when you say your PRAYERS. Pray you’ll never see my face.

I’m not that vulnerable – no, wait – I COULD be, but I won’t be THAT.
I’ll harden up my heart so you won’t start to get to me.
My hunger for your tears won’t wait; I starved away my own.
I’ll tell myself it’s fair because you couldn’t possibly care for me.

I’m the once-upon-a-time that never moved on from that line; the villain, not quite bad enough to hate.
I’m the child who loves to hurt herself because she hurts too much to love.

I won’t let sensibilities take over my design.
I’ll tell myself it’s all about YOU, ‘cause I’m fine, I’m fine.
I’m not that vulnerable (well, maybe I could be, but I WON’T allow it).
I’m over it. You will not close in on me.
I’ve hardened up my heart to numb the sensitivity.
I told myself it’s fair because nobody could possibly care for me.

credits

from Blurred, released May 13, 2013

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about

April Fish Wellington, New Zealand

Stories are variations of truths. Stories are made up.
Stories are honest lies.

Stories become songs, and songs are poems cloaked in sound.
This is art.
Art is in the eye of the beholder.

∴ April Fish are artistic liars. The cheeky blighters.
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